Sunday, 31 December 2017

A new start

We just about to end the year 2017, its been one hard year but we entering in to a new year with a new start.
I would like to take this chance and thank all my supports and fans out there, without you my blogs will be nothing and ill have no reason to write but of course writing for Jesus is on top of the list!
I am bless to know that these blogs have reach over 2000 people worldwide, for me that’s big so thank you, you all are wonderful ! I will be adding a site up on word press and will be starting video blogs so please keep an eye out and please share these with anyone who you think will inspire, because my goal is to inspire as many people as I can!
Ill also like to say thank you to all the people who have given up on me and have rejected me, without you I wont be inspire to write about my pain and speak out so thank you for hurting me and for thinking the worse of me because it has grown me so much that I now look forward in to facing any rejection with 2 hands instead with close eyes!
Also a huge shout out to a family member who told me I should feel sorry for myself ..wait a huge shout out to all the family members who still have me in that monster box throwing all my faults at me, you the reason why one day ill end my life… because lets say it like is dear…you guys messed me up and now im trying fix me but I cant do that, only jesus can.
Thank you for hurting me, thank you for saying so many bad words and thank you for always giving up on me, means the world really, I get it, im such a monster I should go and jump in front of the next train right?
That’s where iv always had it soooo wrong, every time a family  member hurts me or says something so mean and hurt ill run to suicide and to self harm but I choose to run to jesus, he loves me even when I don’t love me.
Enough to those mean family cows…. I mess up but if I always hold on to all the mistakes iv made ill be dead honestly. You can not run a 30km run if you have chains tied on you so break those chains!
To the family members who do love me and keep in touch even when I fail you, thank you for loving me.
So that’s about it, say it like it is dear for 2017!
It’s a new start for each of you and open your hands for it with open eyes! Don’t let challenges break you instead let it build you, don’t let people walk over you, instead fly over them with love and most of all don’t let past hurt be the reason you cry today, cry today for today hurts not yesterday .
Be bless and see you all next year!

Sunday, 10 December 2017

Healing, just happens to be... A process..

I was walking home when I heard a loud noise as I looked around I saw a tree fall down , it fell so hard that it made so much dust, I was super blown away ! 
As I thought about the tree falling down how the roots were so big it must have really been In the right place to be blown over, because it wasn't so windy . it got me thinking about healing and how it happens. 

Recently I had my boss get upset with me because I walked out of a series we have at church for healing. He was upset that I didnt allow God to heal me. I was super upset what he had to say because I had been upset with the fact I could allow myself to walk out, as I question God on why he hadn't healed me, he started showing me that healing doesn't happen over night or in just a moment, not the kind of healing I needed. 

Healing is a process, it never stops and if we were all healed we wouldn't need God. We need to be in the right place to be able to get all those thick roots out, however those roots only Jesus can get out. Nobody can get it out for you. While searching for answers I discovered getting to know Jesus was the answer to my healing. I needed to learn how to have a relationship with Jesus and be open with him. 

Jesus is gentle, he's not going force you and when you allow him he will open small wounds for you to deal with so you can move to the next big ones. Healing isn't a big step take but rather a small step take. Just like the tree needed to be in the right place, in the right season, needed the right rain, the right storms , the right dry days  we too need all of that.
 I disagree with anyone who tells me that healing can happen over night or over weekend. You can not label yourself as everyone else because you not. 
God going take us on a long healing and it starts with little steps. 

At the end of the day healing is a process and only Jesus can finish that process.